R-Word: Spread the Word to End the Word

I pledge and support the elimination of the derogatory use of the r-word from everyday speech and promote the acceptance and inclusion of people with intellectual disabilities.

If you would like to join me or would like to hear how others are spreading the word, please go to www.r-word.org.

Public Service Announcement declaring the “r-word” to be just as hurtful as any other slur.

The following article was borrowed from http://www.r-word.org/r-word-dialog-1.aspx

HOW TO DISCUSS THE R-WORD WITH OTHERS

Having a conversation about the r-word can be difficult and often uncomfortable. Use the dialogues and tips below to help you successfully articulate why the r-word is hurtful and harmful in everyday speech.

Dialogue Scenario 1: When a friend/family member uses the r-word

Person 1: I am such a retard; I forgot to get milk at the grocery store.

Person 2: Hey, I would appreciate it if you didn’t use the word retard around me anymore.

Person 1: Oh don’t worry about it; it’s not a big deal.

Person 2: It actually is a big deal, when you use retard as a synonym for stupid or idiot, you are saying that all people with intellectual disabilities are stupid, and that’s definitely not true.

Person 1: But I’m not making fun of people who are mentally retarded, it’s just a figure of speech. It’s how I talk.

Person 2: The thing is, when you use the R-word as slang, you really are hurting people with intellectual disabilities because of the negative connotation of your comment. The R-word has been associated with people with intellectual and developmental disabilities since its inception, so when you use the word in a negative context, you’re putting down people with intellectual disabilities, regardless of if you mean to or not.

Person 1: I appreciate what you’re saying, but it’s imbedded into my vocabulary. I couldn’t stop saying it if I tried.

Person 2: I’m not trying to tell you what you can or cannot say, but what I want you to recognize is that people with intellectual disabilities deserve respect, and using another word instead of the R-word is one step towards making them feel respected and valued in society.

Person 1: Ok, I can understand it might be hurtful to use the word when a person with an intellectual disability is around, but why does it matter now, when I’m just hanging out and joking with my friends?

Person 2: Using the R-word doesn’t just hurt people with intellectual disabilities, but it also hurt their friends and families. [Discuss personal story about why this is important to you]. Having seen the hurt that the R-word can cause, I know it’s important for me to take a stand and try to change the conversation. I hope you can understand why it hurts and upsets me when the R-word is used and why I would appreciate if you chose another word to use.

Person 1: I’m sorry; I didn’t realize how much the R-word upset you. I will try to use another word instead.

Person 2: Thank you for understanding.

Tips for a successful conversation:

• Stay calm and collected, it will not help the other person see your point if you are angry and emotional.
• Try to understand the reason he/she disagrees with you. Listen, be respectful and then provide a counterargument that highlights the harmful and hurtful effects of using the R-word.
• Share a personal story about why the R-word is hurtful to you. Personal stories will help people more easily relate to what you are saying because it illustrates your personal commitment to the campaign.
• If you encounter a question you are unable to answer, direct the individual to the Spread the Word to End the Word website (www.r-word.org) to learn more about the campaign, Special Olympics and Best Buddies.

Water Babies

All three of the Taylor kiddos are in group swim classes now at EVO Swim School.  They love it, but I think I may love it as much or more than they do… and that’s saying a lot.  Ari is our most recent joiner, as I wasn’t sure for a couple months that the group lessons would be a good fit for her.  Turned out I was wrong about that, and I couldn’t be happier to be wrong at that. 

Ari feels completely at home in her lessons and has already improved so much.  She doesn’t stop grinning the entire time she swims, and she took to her teacher, John, immediately.  It goes without saying that anyone who puts Ari in the water is automatically added to her favorite people list, but John is incredibly good with her and really believes in her potential to learn to swim.  I know that she can sense his confidence in her and that she appreciates being treated just like all the other swimmers.

Ari is already an old pro at holding her breath underwater, but now she is learning how to coordinate kicking at the same time, which is challenging but definitely doable for her.  Ari is also learning how to float on her back, which might be a little harder due to her balance and tone issues, but she is comfortable in that position and is willing to try anything.

Ari gives John a high five and claps for herself whenever she has completed a drill.  I would bring her to swimming lessons even if it was just for these moments during which I get to watch her beam with pride at her achievement.  Of course, I’m on the side of the pool hooting and hollering like a cheerleader with a crush on the football captain. 

   

Gabe has graduated two levels and is now in the Sea Lion class (Ari is in the Otters – level 1, Bella is in Seals – level 2).  He has mastered his kicking and back floats, and now he’s working on learning “big arms” among other things.  His instructor, Ben, doesn’t think he’ll be in this class much longer (he’s only been in two weeks anyhow), as Gabe is quickly mastering these skills in preparation to move up to the Porpoise class already.

    

I can’t believe this is the same kid who wouldn’t jump off the side of the pool with his floaties on at the beginning of the summer.  A big THANK YOU to our friends, the Stotens, who introduced us to EVO Swim School.

Bella loves swim class as much as the others.  I am still being constantly amazed at the things Bella manages to do without a left hand.  I tell you, nothing will hold this girl back.  Right now, she is working on demonstrating her breath control by swimming the width of the pool without rolling onto her back, and doing back floats with kicks. 

  

We plan on keeping the kids in swim year round to keep them active and so that they continue to improve on their swim skills even during the cooler months.  As long as they keep on loving it, I’ll keep on packing our bag every week.

Shout Out to My Readers

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Therapy Sampling

Since I’ve been doing a little exposé on our extracurricular activities, I thought I’d drop in Ari’s favorite activity (besides swim, which will come later) – Occupational Therapy.  Ari does some of the most fun things in OT, and she has really taken off since we began taking her to clinic-based therapy with Miss Becky.  No two weeks are alike when it comes to activities, because our therapist just happens to be one of the most creative and innovative  and child-focused minds I’ve ever met. 

Some things they worked on this week was using two hands to hold and pull a bubble maker to blow bubbles (switching hands so both had to work on each different activity), and playing with water beads, alternately switching hands to weight-bear and play in the beads. 

   

Gabe and Bella love to come along, because everything they do here is so fun and stimulating. Of course, Ari has an even better time knowing that they think what she’s working on is cool and exciting too.

   

And He’s Off

See Gabe.

See Gabe run.

The boy had his first “sports class” this week.  The learned how to correctly throw a basketball, run backwards, run cones, swing a baseball bat, run bases, somersault, and do hops over a beam.  Most importantly, though, Gabe got the opportunity to do something just for him.  No sisters allowed.  And the no sister rule is not because my view on gender roles is inflexible, but because I believe Gabe and each of my children deserve their own time to shine and excel in something that is 100% their own.  Gabe wanted to play sports, so here we are :), and we are loving it!

 

Cheering on his team mates.

 

Coach Lance challenged Gabe to a race and taught him how to cut in close to the cone, so that no one can cut him off on the left.

 

Gabe takes himself very seriously :).  I can’t take credit for his athleticism, which he obviously got from Daddy, but I’m fully to blame for his competitiveness. 

 

Gabe was bound and determined to win this race against his long-time buddy, Cole.  Hands to yourself, Gabe!

        

Run, Gabe, run!