Thursday, April 24, 2014

My Young Man

It’s not often that I get to write a post about my son Gabe.  He is independent, self-sufficient, and manages to successfully evade my camera most days.  But not today.  I wanted to feature him for a couple reasons.  First, he’s growing up too quickly.  Isn’t it so apparent?  He turned seven, and you’d think he’d turned eleven!  I want to document something about him at this age, because it’s so important to me to back up the hard drive of my increasingly fragile memory.  The second reason is because there was an event that took place yesterday that inspired me to feel extra proud of him.  I am going to put out a warning here:  I will be writing about Gabe from a proud mom’s point of view bragging ceaselessly about my son… so turn away now if that kind of thing makes you cringe.

Gabe reads.  He reads like no child I’ve ever met.  He started reading at the age of 3 1/2, and he hasn’t stopped for even a day since then.  Right now, he is about to finish Book 4 of the Harry Potter Series (having read them in order so far).  His other favorite books include every Roald Dahl classic, all of the books in the Percy Jackson and The Olympians series, and many of Rick Riordan’s other books as well.  He learns from reading, and he’s currently an expert in Greek mythology (having wanted to learn more because of the Percy Jackson books, he borrowed other books on Greek Mythology and can rattle off about six generations back of Greek gods).  People at his school often ask me if he really can sit down and understand the big books he carries around.  The answer is yes.  He aces his comprehension tests.  They ask if he really does enjoy that level of reading.  Yes, people.  This isn’t something I would ever force him to do.  In fact, in the rare event that he does something deserving of a consequence, he gets grounded from his book for that night.  It’s the only punishment that holds any weight with him.  People also ask me if Gabe ever has time to play.  Which brings me to my next topic.

Gabe plays… as much or more than most kids his age.  I allow my kids very little screen time.  He doesn’t get to carry around a DS or play games on my phone (much less his own phone) whenever he gets bored.  This opens up so much time for not only reading, but play.  He’s imaginative, and when he plays pretend, he calls it “acting out” (he means acting).  He insists on doing this behind closed doors, as he’s very private about his pretend play.  I pop in on him all the time and catch him in the middle of some epic battle or magic spell, at which time he gets embarrassed and stops abruptly.  He has always done this ever since he was a toddler.  In addition to “acting out”, Gabe adores his Legos.  I recently put together a giant Lego table for his room, which displays all 20 something Lego sets that he has built and rebuilt countless times and their accompanying mini figures.  He has every piece in a proper place, and can tell me the significance of each one.  There is usually some type of battle or good vs. evil type struggle going on, but it changes all the time.  Gabe loves Pokemon, which I don’t get.  At all.  Thankfully, Jake has made the gargantuan effort to learn this second language, and they play it together late into the night.  He does get video game time on the weekends, when he plays Mindcraft till my head is ready to explode from the dreary background music.  Gabe is a social butterfly (except he wouldn’t appreciate the butterfly title).  He is playful and easily makes friends with kids of all ages and genders wherever he goes.  He is not exclusive at all, and welcomes anyone and everyone who wants to play.  Gabe’s newest obsession is with tetherball.  He plays tetherball 90% of his recesses at school.  The other 10% of the time is a mix of kickball, soccer, and “girls chase boys” (whatever that means).  He loves tetherball so much that his Grammy and Papa bought him a tetherball stand for our backyard, which he enjoys immensely.  Gabe is also into swimming and tennis right now.  I honestly don’t know if he is any good at tennis, because Jake drives him to that activity, but he loves it, and that’s good enough for me.

Gabe works.  I hate to say it, but Gabe never caught a break in this department.  With the extra demands that I have always had with Ari, Gabe has grown up a helper.  Sometimes I feel guilty about it, but I remember that there was a time when kids were expected to work hard for the family, and I don’t think those kids turned out any worse for the wear.  Or at least, that’s what I keep telling myself.  Gabe has “morning chores” which just entails getting his room picked up and ready and getting himself ready for the day.  He is in charge of taking out the recycling every day.  He has to clear the table with Bella at breakfast and dinner.  He watches (plays with) Liam when I need to focus on Ari or cook dinner.  He and Bella have to pick up the playroom before they get to watch any movies.  He puts away his laundry every week.  He helps dad with gardening (a little).  He is also pretty used to fetching things for me, opening doors, pushing wheelchairs and shopping carts whenever needed; all of which he does without complaint (so long as Bella is helping too).

Gabe cares.  Remember that event that I mentioned earlier?  I’m going to get to it now.  Yesterday, Gabe was faced with a very difficult situation at school.  For the first and probably not the last time, one of Gabe’s classmates said something about Ari that was unkind.  Before I get into it, let me first say that this child was and still is one of Gabe’s friends.  She is a sweet and intelligent child, raised by great parents.  She has since apologized to Gabe.  We do not hold what she said against her, because as we know, making mistakes is how children learn life lessons and grow to be even better people.  I didn’t hear about this occurrence from Gabe right away.  I got a phone call from the child’s parent, offering up profuse apologies for her daughter’s mistake, of which I had previously been totally unaware.  When I asked Gabe what happened that day with that friend, he looked up at me and asked “How do you know about that?”.  It turns out, he had been bearing the burden of it alone in an effort to protect my feelings.  When he opened up, he told me what the friend said, and I then asked what he had replied.  His eyes welled up with tears as he said “I told her not to say that about my sister!”.  One of his buddies also bravely defended Ari right alongside him.  I asked him if he cried and he said “yes.”  My heart broke right then and there, in small part over the realization that Ari wouldn’t be immune to cruelty from others, but mostly because Gabe had to experience it firsthand.  At the same time, my heart swelled with pride that Gabe’s instinct was to stand up for what was right and courageously defend his twin sister.  My love and respect for him grew immensely.

This is not the first story that demonstrates Gabe’s integrity and sensitivity.  It’s just one that I thought I should record.  I am so proud and privileged to be this boy’s mom.

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2 comments:

Unknown said...

Elisa, It was great to read what your little boy is doing. It is a great example for me and my family. My family and I met Jake during his mission (in that time Elder Taylor)and it is a blessing to see the beautiful family that he has now.

You are a great example to me. Thanks for sharing.

Unknown said...
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